Each of us is involved in many connections, and the quality of those interactions has a significant impact on our physical and emotional health. Of all, we all bring our own way of being in the world and our own self-image to any partnership. We often seek out partners in the belief, perhaps even subconsciously, that they would “fix” us or help us attain the confidence and self-acceptance that we all need as individuals. Of all, the purpose of a couple’s relationship is to love and be loved, in whatever unique way each of us seeks mutual and ideal joy.
Whether we are a bit of a loner or prefer crowds, the interpersonal patterns we create from infancy shape our personal relationships and, in the long run, have a huge impact on our fulfillment and pleasure.
It’s common to seek guidance from a mental health professional because the relationship patterns we’ve been using just don’t work anymore and frequently are causing a situation to worsen. It may seem on the surface a cruel irony that the person we want to love the most is the one that can trigger intense feelings, and not always good ones. But if we look at the wider perspective, that often annoying partner gives us a chance to learn to be a more understanding and compassionate person, and in the long run, to bring respect and joy to our most intimate relationship.
We have to confess that people close to us can bring us a lot of emotional pain, especially if they have difficulties like addiction, eating disorders, depression, or an inability to regulate their rage. Poor communication patterns alone can cause considerable discord. It’s also crucial to acknowledge that we may have played a role in our loved ones developing these issues. It is our job to enhance and preserve our own mental health, as well as to contribute to the emotional health of the partnership to the greatest extent feasible. Compassion is one of our core human inclinations as a pair.
That is why it is vital for both partners in a difficult or dysfunctional relationship to seek help from a skilled mental health professional and learn new strategies to develop positive relationship patterns.
Extensive research and ever-expanding alternatives for couples therapy provide compassionate, results-oriented, and confidential counseling that can spark breakthroughs that lead to improved physical and mental health, as well as peace of mind.
Here are 5 good reasons to start couples counseling / therapy:
- The relationship is in a downward spiral — If a long-term relationship or marriage has reached a deadlock and concerns cannot be resolved, but the partners want to make a genuine effort to find a fresh path toward resolution, they may seek counseling. Often, one person initiates counseling, but there is a much better possibility of improving the relationship if both parties seek the advice of a professional therapist.
- Sexual difficulties – A good relationship must have a strong physical component based on each partner’s needs and aspirations. A passionate sexual connection is wanted by some, and most couples, but emotional experiences from the past can come in the way of trust, which leads to passion. Others may value spending time sitting close together on the sofa watching movies or walking hand-in-hand. Some couples love spending intimate physical time together on tasks, such as making things at home or going hiking or camping. The difference in the physical and sexual wants of the separate partners can frequently produce a problem. That is why it is critical to locate a therapist you trust and feel at ease with in order to define each person’s hopes and desires and find a solution to achieve a mutually satisfying physical connection.
- Preparing for marriage — Some couples seek counseling before to marriage, and some seek treatment even if they are living together but have no imminent intentions to marry. Getting off to a good start can help you create a strong relationship that will last even when there is dispute or problems that is not your fault, such as a job loss or illness in the extended family. Life’s difficulties may and do occur in any family, and a couple is certain to encounter some unanticipated hardship during their time together. Two people are never mirror pictures of each other, and understanding skills for dealing with differences will enhance a relationship and give it the tenacity to sail through turbulent tides and calm seas.
- Giving it one more shot – People on the eve of divorce frequently seek counseling as a “last ditch” attempt to save their marriage. Working with a therapist you trust can help each person recall why they fell in love in the first place. If there are truly ‘irreconcilable differences,’ a therapist can assist a couple understand why their relationship isn’t working in the long run, and guide each partner to move ahead with insight to make future relationships better.
- Family issues – Parenting difficulties can cause two individuals to grow apart, so seeking couples counseling first will help set shared family goals and create a more tranquil home. If it is appropriate to include the children or teenagers at some time, the therapist may advise family therapy.
The one thing that all of these, and many other challenges, have in common is that no one lives or functions alone. In many circumstances, the issues cannot be remedied on their own, especially if unfavorable interactions continue to deteriorate the relationship.
Emotional “triggers” are sometimes deeply established from childhood traumas or other painful or cruel events, leaving a person consciously unaware of why they behave the way they do.
Our mental health, with all of its strengths and flaws, is closely intertwined in our closest personal connections, therefore mending begins here, in the intensity of the one-to-one relationship.
To help the couple achieve the objective of a healthy, well-functioning, and more pleasurable relationship, experienced therapists frequently utilize a combination of strategies tailored to the unique needs of the individuals.
As the couple’s relationship changes and improves, therapy can evolve with them.
At times, each person may visit with a therapist individually, while at other times, they may meet as a pair.
In collaboration with a trusted therapist, the couple will select the type and duration of therapy.
What is the next step?
If you or someone you love is considering individual therapy or counseling, please contact Omni Layne Counseling. We are a team of professionals who have expertise to help.
Call us at our office to schedule an appointment with one of our highly skilled clinicians at Omni Layne Counseling, PLLC.